Saturday 5 July 2008

Matt Please Don't Spoil It For Me, I'm Not Visiting Your Site

****ing bastard school play, oh hang the asterisks, fucking fucking bastard school play and removal to Reading and no way of recording, argh, oh fuck, oh fucking fucking fuck. Doubtless this man knows all about it, well he would wouldn't he, the miserable lucky fucking bastard, oh bollocks. bollocks bollocks bollocks I probaly won't know for a week!!! A WHOLE WEEK!!!! Fuck!!!!!

Everyone is a bastard.

Bastards!!!

Bollocks. Even the gf won't even hint at what happened. Miserable cow.


Dare I go to Outpost Gallifrey....no, I daren't. I don't want to know, I just want to SEE THE FUCKER.

Now you know. This is why I was not having sex when I was 13, or indeed 16. Because this is what I was saying all the time. Well, 13, yes, but by 16, there was no Who, so it was all about not meeting the gf(as she then was) but spending my £10 on the latest VHS (such as the Daemons). At 16 1/2 I wanted to see DOCTOR WHO AND THE SILURIANS more than I wanted to kiss the then gf. ~Much as I loved kissing her, the thought of Jon Pertwee..and the luscious Caroline John, and early synth music, and that gorgeous converted VHS quality, and Fulton Mackay, and Major Baker, and Nyder!!! And GEOFFREY PALMER.....well now, that was more than enough for me then: nervous fumbling? awkward tongues? rejected advances? Fuck it all!!!

DOCTOR WHO IS THE DOG'S BOLLOCKS.

NuWho is more like the mongrel's slightly lower hanging right testicle, but it is still ace.


No wonder I've never exactly been a stud, but am somewhere to the right (I assume) of the Spectrum*.



*What do you mean, what Spectrum? The Aspergers one of course.


"But would you do it?"
..."Yes, yes, I would do it." [snaps forefinger and thumb] "That power would set me up above the gods! And through the Daleks, I shall have that power!"

3 comments:

Shades said...

Have you watched it yet?

Matt M said...

No access to the BBC iPlayer?

I've not revealed anything on my blog, other than that David Tennant turns out to have been the Rani all along and that Tegan pops up to save the day, so you're safe to visit it.

Matt M said...

Okay - now there's one teeny-tiny spoiler up, although it won't make much sense if you haven't seen the episode.