Friday 30 March 2007

Drummer's Head vs Drummer's Arse

Alright. I can accept that some people - mainly those who know me, may their shell suits be blighted - think that I have my head stuffed so far up my own arse that I can tickle my own tongue.

However. This is not true. There is a breed of people who have their heads a lot further up their own jacksies than myself. Such people, occasionally known as "teachers" with a subdivision who shall remain nameless, are thought to spend entire days eulogising themselves and their ideals, at enormous expense. They are also thought to organise immense entertainments and to spend so much time organising them that the object of said events is _completely forgotten_. In the course of this, some things which are believed to have been sighted at 9pm on dank Thursday nights include 40 minute unfunny sketches - one of the worst "entz" crimes ever devised.* In this devilish medium, some largely untalented persons recite (or worse, it is thought, _improvise_ ) cliched-friendly-indictments of known persons for the delectation of non-persons present. Or of persons unpresent. Either way the effect is deadly. Within 30 minutes mild irritation is caused to the outer thought-centres of the brain, inducing a slight dream state known as "boredom". In this conscious-state it is thought that committed persons can suddenly -

lose their commitment -

Anyway. In such a tedious environment an individual can succumb to collectivist ideals, such as blasting the damn hell out of half the bastards here; or worse, of "fomenting revolution", in which persons deemed arbitrarily to be in power (usually those sighted by the revolutionary at any given time) are slaughtered by huge weapons, or even by the _sheer power of thought_. Occasionally the revolutionary is thought to put a whole load of people up against an imaginary wall and shoot the sam hell out of their sorry asses.

The cautionary tale here is to not get involved with people who think their cause is more important than any particular individual (especially when the individual in question is supposedly being celebrated but generally the moral applies anyhow); and to tell people to "fuck off" when one is invited to anything.

Anything at all.

AND the evening was not for the drummer. The drummer was merely a spectator with a headache.


* Another such crime is showing film of the _drummer's bald patch_ to 300 people.

3 comments:

Crushed said...

Sounds Hell.
Is this something us Cowboys miss out in?

James Higham said...

Know what you mean. I have no teacher friends, apart from Welshcakes and yourself.

Shades said...

It sounds like these people have an Arse/Elbow confusion problem.