Wednesday 12 March 2008

Mortal Sins

According the blogosphere, The Pope should of said : "1. Being a Catholic" and then anything else would have come as a bonus. I find it a bit odd that the church has such immense influence in countries where hardly anyone is Catholic but anyhow. Plus that people listen to the pope on condoms but _not_ on the rest of sexual doctrine (ie keep it in your pants unless you're married), which in my not inconsiderable experience of being one of these cunts, weighs rather more heavily on the individual, seems a bit strange. Plus also the church must be actively stopping deliveries of condoms, like by hijacking vans and torching them or summat. I guess it's all true though, because unbiased commentators like St Polly of Toynbee and St George of Moonbat have frequently asserted it as fact. Ergo it must obtain.

Still, I can reassure my readers that on absolutely no account will I be immensely rich any time soon: nor, indeed, am I about to perform fiendish experiments on embryos, nor defile the environment (oh no actually I tell a lie: my little Fiesta was caning the A420 and A34 this evening in 2nd and 3rd. How much emissions is that). Nor will I be acting against fundamental human dignity, unless you count having my pants sticking out a bit.

Also as a pisshead I will be contributing far more to schoolsnospitals than any of those NewLabour twats: the fuckers are putting my taxes up again. So you can fuck off if you are one of those puritans who think that you're not puritans because it's a made up rightwing concept and all you're doing is trying to make people more respectful/better citizens/think the right thoughts - I'm making the schoolsnosptials even better with every Stella I buy. Plus I've never gone to A&E or owt like that.


Oi! Pint of Stella! and a packet of cheese&onion! Come on John, I'm thirsty!

2 comments:

Crushed said...

They sem to forget all the missionary work done in the world, don't they?

Remember that Mother Theresa died at the same time as someone else, and who id the British popoluace think the bigger saint?

Enough said.

Bill Haydon said...

Well, CBI, as I'm sure you know, many well educated twats, some of whom write for Viz, and some of whom are Christopher Hitchens, think that Mother Teresa was in fact only a little better than Hitler, and that pissed-up ex communists and fuck-awful shit humour magazine cartoonists have done more for humanity than that sour faced old bitch ever managed.